Tonight marked the end of two and a half years of my son living with us. As he walked over to the table with some food, I casually asked what he was up to.
“I was hungry, so I made food for myself,” he said.
But then I noticed—it was raw.
“I can cook that for you—it’s super easy!” I offered.
He shook his head. “I just wanted to eat something I used to have with my old family.”
So, I sat down with him, inviting him to share more.
At just 6 years old, he was the one finding food for his younger siblings, who were only 2 years and 4 months old when they came to us. His parents wouldn’t feed him unless he was awake, and even then, there was rarely food to go around.
They spent their money on cigarettes and other things, leaving him to search the back of their van for coins. He would walk to the store alone, buying packets of ramen—not knowing how to cook them, just eating the dry noodles with sauce.
And yet, he divided the food, making sure his baby siblings had enough, even trying to prepare bottles for the infant. At just 6 years old.
I asked him to show me how to make it his way.
We sat together, breaking up the noodles, adding sauce, and eating it just as he used to. He laughed when I struggled to do it right and reminisced about the first time I cooked ramen for him—how he refused to eat it because it was too different from what he knew.
“I couldn’t trust you back then,” he admitted.
Pretty deep thinking for a 9-year-old.
But now? Now, he knows love. He knows safety. He knows he is home.
I share this because trauma doesn’t just disappear. Adopting a child doesn’t erase their past. It stays with them, in memories, in habits, in the way they see the world.
Kids from tough backgrounds aren’t ‘difficult’—they’re survivors.
And when given love, patience, and understanding, they transform.
Tonight, I walked away feeling a mix of emotions—sadness, admiration, but mostly, overwhelming pride. My son has been through so much, yet he remains so full of love.
To anyone working with children from hard places—be willing to sit on the floor, eat uncooked noodles, and just be there.
Because our kids did too. ❤️
All credit goes to the rightful owner~
