To the woman at Aldi who told the cashier I had a fake baby and was trying to smuggle yogurts: for the record, my baby is 100% real, yogurts cost like 25 cents, and I’m lactose intolerant—I don’t even eat dairy. Honestly, thanks for the laugh. After being up all night with my very real baby, I needed it. Parenting is hard enough without random accusations from strangers.